The Herz's Home Page

I moved it to August 11, 2016. It made more sense there.

or “Why I am a Landmark Junkie ”

Landmark Worldwide is a company committed to reliably delivering that which makes a real difference in people's lives. It accomplishes this through its transformational courses, the foundation of which is the Landmark Forum.

Landmark has been big part of my life, and especially of the things that work in my life for more than 21 years. Most anyone who spends more than a token amount of time with me will hear me talk about the Landmark Forum. So I thought I'd explain a little bit about why. Now I can point you here instead of trying to come up with it over and over again.

The main reason: I'm with the same woman, Sharleen, twenty years on, and Landmark has given us the ability to play with each other, to laugh with—and at—each other, to not take ourselves too seriously, and to see how damned big we are in the world.

We have four amazing kids, and who we are with and for them comes from what we have learned at Landmark. From Landmark, we have taken on practices of acknowledging our children, and learned to listen for what is truly imporant.

I get to be with myself. Twenty one years in, and I am still noticing where the little voice in my head (others might call them internal dialogues or hidden scripts) are keeping me from creating the world I want. And when I notice them, I can deny them their power.

For instance, less than two weeks ago, I noticed I've got one about how “I've got to do it alone. ” Noticing it let me give it up. For the first time, I created a team around a goal in my life I've been pursuing for 20 years. Also out of that, I met with someone about forming a pretty neat partnership. These would not have happened without this work.

For the new year, I created the possibility of being Active, Present, and Alive. By the end of January, I'd been to Germany and visited with my cancer-stricken Aunt and Uncle (he's now dead), five first cousins, and five more of their family, most of whom I hadn't seen this millenium.

I get to forgive myself. This one is the hardest for me. I often feel that—except for my family—my past is a sea of mistakes, lost chances and missed opportunities.

From Landmark, I see that my playing the victim of this past robs me of my future. It's a place I easily go, but I have the tools, and the partners, to notice this sick game. When I do that, I can actually create bold new futures.

I can lean into my fear. The first thing that I notice when I create a new future is the gap between where I am and that which I am inventing. The next thing I want to do is throw my hands up and walk away.

But I get that's only the little voice in my head, the child who was embarrassed, who failed, who wasn't enough, trying to keep me safe.

And I notice I am 47 and I don't need the conversations of my naive and scared younger to run my life today. I can say “I am scared, ” and act anyway.

In short, I can give myself Permission to Be the great person that I always suspected was inside there somewhere, but was too afraid to let out. He's actually far more powerful than I ever imagined.

So I share because I think a world of empowered, present people, people who are up to big things, people who lean into their fear, people who are willing to create the world they want to see, to borrow a phrase “to be the change they'd like to see in the world ” (M. Ghandi), would be a great world to live in.

I share because I know anyone who wants to be this has it available to him.

It's worth it. That's all. If you see yourself in this, and can find a way to afford it, it's a gift you really should give yourself.

All My Best,

So Sharleen is inspired by Elliot who sends his family a quick update every day. So while I am not up to committing to that level of involvement, I think it's a great idea. It makes sense on a lot of levels. As a coach and a student of what brings us happiness and satisfaction, I see this as a great path to both. This exercise provides us a great opportunity to constantly acknowledge the things we are grateful for and keep us present to the things we have to celebrate in our lives.

And today, I'd like to celebrate my Manu. He went with Uri and I to the early minyan yesterday. Afterwards, we were home alone. So we read or played some, and then I suggested we learn a bit, first some Torah, then some Shakespeare.

So this is not a parsha that excites me, but the part about spurious seminal emissions did somehow engage me. So somehow we got from there to the topic of twins (I don't know if this was by way of the birds and the bees or not), and I, not being a person who throws anything out, pulled out my Applied Animal Reproduction textbook, and we got to learning about it. We got into the various types of uteri and penises, the morphology of the testes, the fertilization of the egg, and even a bit about the development of the embryo and placental attachment.

And yes, we did learn a little bit about twins. It happens a lot in sheep, which is great, but when it happens with horses, often leads to spontaneous abortion. Along the way, we learned why rabbits can simultaneously be at different stages in a pregnancy and cats can have kittens of multiple fathers, and discovered why you can make a cane out of a bull's penis, but would not be able to do the same with that of a horse. We didn't cover it all as Yakov came back and let us know it was time for Kiddush, but we both enjoyed ourselves.

We never did get to the Shakespeare. I don't think he really wanted to. But I thought it would be a great idea to start memorizing Hamlet's famous speech; so now I am about nine lines in, and I'm wondering how I ever memorized even one part in a play, but I guess the muscles we don't use atrophy; so I'll play inside this one a while and see if I can't build it up. And in the meantime, I'll wrap my head about the taxes and see if I can't get them done this week.

And if you're not yet on the list, you can get on it here!

I answered a few questions for my alumni magazine about what I am up to; so I thought I might as well share here as well. I hope you are all enjoying your 2015.

I'm now in two lines of work. One, I am personal coach; I help people achieve their dreams. And I am most jazzed about working with fathers who are committed to raising awesome human beings, starting obviously with children who are confident, secure, happy and proud.

I also love working with high-profile individuals to honor the multiple domains in their lives with grace and ease while playing at the top of their game.

Two, I help people and businesses design their websites and manage their on-line presences to drive the business they built their website to serve.

I now have three teenagers with the fourth not far behind. We've done a great job with them and they do us proud.

I have put my name in for the 2016 presidential race, but could use some help getting the word out. You can visit the Campaign Website or facebook page. Once we crank this up to ten million followers - targeted for the end of 2015 - we should have a profound impact on the direction of political discussion in this country (in other words towards the center and a search for what binds us and brings us forward as one great society).

I am looking to add a greater accountability for the proper functioning of the institutions that shape our society, whether it's working with public officials, consulting for governments or their agencies or subunits (I am particularly interested in school systems and police departments at the moment), or taking on a role with direct authority.